Hey, Man, Now You're Really Livin'

Yesterday I experienced the height of sophistication (for college), and the height of...drunkenness is the only word I can come up with. I put on a nice dress and did my makeup and biked to the beautiful theater where I was privileged enough to get to see Hilary Hahn perform. She is an incredible violinist; I was completely transfixed by her music. I took notes because I have to write a paper on the concert, but when she played the Fugue movement of one of the Bach unaccompanied sonatas, I experienced a liminal moment.
After the concert, I rode my bike home alone, in the dark & the freezing cold, talking to myself the whole time like a crazy person. Maybe it was just because Halloween was so close, but I was a little creeped out. Thank god I hadn't watched the new Halloween yet or I would have been a basket case. I put on my slutty clothes and was good to go.
What happened for the next hour and a half is irrelevant; it is safe to say it was lame. We ended up downstairs in a friend's room watching Halloween and drinking copious amounts of alcohol. I learned a new drinking game and I had a great time.
Sitting here now with my Cheetos, I know that I love both of the things I did last night, and that it's okay. I can be the classical music-loving girl my parents know me as and a girl who wears slutty Halloween costumes and takes shots on a Saturday night too. I'm happy to know that I'm doing things that make me happy and that I'm having a fan-fucking-tastic time here. That's pretty much what matters right now.

I'll Make A Man Out of You

Real men sing unabashedly. Even if they can't sing very well, a real man will belt out songs with you, and an even better man will sing along with you when you watch musicals together. I spent the last four years of my life in choir, and all of my friends were choir people. I had forgotten what it was like to be around guys who were afraid to spontaneously burst into song. Luckily, my girl friends here sing too.
Guys who are afraid to sing because they think it's "gay" have some sort of insecurity with their sexuality. Dudes, if you like singing and you're confident about it, people won't give you shit for it. Most people actually think it's really cool if you sing. I promise. It'll score you chicks.

She's So Heavy

I woke up yesterday, startled and with my right arm completely numb, in a room I still haven't fully adjusted to. I woke up in the same house for the last 15 years of my life, waking up here is very different. I went to breakfast by myself, which doesn't actually bother me. I've always enjoyed some solitude; as an only child, you must adapt to spending time by yourself. What I had for breakfast is immaterial. I slung by backpack on and got on my bike. I've grown very attached to her in the last two and a half weeks. We've been through stuff together now. I went to my music lit class and got entrenched in beautiful music, and I felt for the hundredth time since I've been here that this is where I belong. This is right. Who knows what else I did. I know I studied and I know I fell into my new Monday routine. I watched movies with my friends and laughed A LOT and made gross jokes and felt like I belonged. Nothing feels better to me than that.