Monday, August 8, 2011

Leaving on a Jet Plane

I am filled with disgust. Disgust for people close to me, disgust for people I used to know better than anyone else did, disgust for the way the government is, disgust for Sarah Palin (but that's nothing new). My disgust stems from disappointment, from being naive and thinking that things change, and from other people's complete ineptitude in certain aspects of their lives. It's interesting that I am not currently disgusted with myself. I am actually finally really happy with who I am and what I am doing with my life. Today I was crushed by the swift and steady hand of disappointment. I hate that other people are able to have such a strong hold over me. I hate that I feel too strongly about most things. It's wonderful when what I am feeling is overwhelming joy or love, and just terrible when what I am feeling is gut-wrenching grief or loss. I wish I could leave those feelings behind.

Now I know what all my English teachers were talking about when they told me that my essays are inconveniently organized. 

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